


sticking together and seeing it through

by besidemethewholedamntime



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, Gen, Hugs, mentions of anxiety attacks but nothing graphic, set sometime season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 17:25:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16330400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/besidemethewholedamntime/pseuds/besidemethewholedamntime
Summary: Coming back to Earth is an adjustment. Luckily there are friends there to make it easier.A prompt fill for @agentofserenity who requested Jemma Simmons and Bobbi Morse and 'Just breathe, okay?'





	sticking together and seeing it through

**Author's Note:**

  * For [agentofserenity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/agentofserenity/gifts).



> Here it is! The finished piece - I'm so sorry it took me so long!   
> I've never written Bobbi before so I truly hope this is alright - but please let me know if there's anything about her character I could improve on!  
> I'm posting this in a separate bit (like I did with the Quakerider one) because my drabbles work is very FS centred and I didn't want it to get lost - I also hope this is okay :)   
> There's very vague references to an anxiety attack in here, just in case you missed the tags. it's not graphic but just so you're aware. Keep yourself happy!   
> Title and lyrics are from 'You've Got A Friend In Me' by Randy Newman  
> Thank you very much for the prompt, and I hope you enjoy!

> _When the road looks rough ahead_   
>  _And you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed_   
>  _You just remember what your old pal said_   
>  _Boy, you've got a friend in me_   
>  _Yeah, you've got a friend in me_
> 
> _~Randy Newman, 'You've Got A Friend In Me'_

 

It begins with a crash.

There’s a bottle – brown and cool- in her hands and then quite suddenly there isn’t. Jemma looks down at her hands, unsure of how she could have lost control of them without even knowing.

Lab technicians begin to swarm, checking and cleaning. It was nothing dangerous, she knows. She goes to say to them, tell them there’s no need to panic, but no words come out. It’s how she imagines being paused in a video is like, except she appears to be the only one affected.

“Dr Simmons?”

A girl, a young PhD student looking to SHIELD to offer guidance stands before her. Jemma knows her, selected her for the new programme to try and entice people into their world. Her name is Mari. She’s young and bright and has a twinkle in her eye every time she gets to run a scientific analysis. Jemma looks at her and sees what she used to be like, and, what she maybe could be again.

It’s too hard to answer. Her tongue is stuck, glued to her mouth in the most uncomfortable way. Why can’t she speak? Why can’t she move? Why is there solvent splattering her shoes and there doesn’t seem to be enough energy within her to care?

“Should I get someone? Dr Simmons? Are you alright?”

Mari hovers anxiously, brown eyes big and round. Jemma wants to comfort her, let her know she’s alright, that oh this is nothing compared to everything else, but her brain has suddenly stopped and she can do nothing.

“Hey, guys. How we all doing in here?”

That voice… Jemma knows that voice. It’s familiar but new. Unexpected. It comes from behind her and she can’t see who it is.

“Simmons, hey. How’s it going?”

“She’s, I mean, I don’t know what’s wrong. She dropped the bottle and I, I don’t know. Should I get someone?”

Mari’s voice is high. Jemma feels guilty. The girl is barely twenty. She should be setting an example. Being strong. Instead she is here, stuck.

“Simmons?” There’s a face in front of her now. Blonde hair, twinkling eyes that have stories to last for years. It’s Bobbi. But what is Bobbi doing here? Bobbi shouldn’t be here. She’s in exile, sent far away. Never to return. A consequence of SHIELD.

“Jemma?” Her own name now, softly whispered. “Come on, let’s go somewhere.”

As she takes her by the elbow, Jemma remembers. They’re back, her and Hunter. Here to help rebuild SHIELD, help as it comes back into the foreground. Strings have been pulled – yanked – and conditions revoked and now their friends are back. She’s ever so glad.

Bobbi leads her down hallways that suddenly seem so frightening and unfamiliar. Has that light always flickered? Have those steps always clanged quite so loudly? Has the air always felt so thick and suffocating? She doesn’t know and doesn’t say and allows herself to be dragged to Bobbi and Hunter’s room.

“Here,” Bobbi says, once they’re inside. She flicks on the light switch and quickly snatches some clothes up from the floor to toss into the laundry basket. “You sit here, on the bed. Don’t worry,” she smiles, making light, “it’s my side.”

Jemma wants to laugh at that, she does. It’s funny. Bobbi and Hunter’s relationship is genuine and warm and something she loves. Except the freeze has worn off and now there’s a panic, rising higher and higher in her chest and making it hard to breath. Her breath comes harder, faster, and soon there’s just shallow breaths with tears escaping.

Bobbi sits down beside her, rubbing her back in comforting circles. “Just breathe, okay? Just slow breath in, slow breath out. Do it in time with me.”

Inhale. Wait. Exhale. Wait. They do it together. Bobbi’s hand rises and falls to help her keep time. Soon the panic recedes, oxygen washes its way back into her lungs and the darkness creeps away from her vision. Shame begins to settle in her chest.

“I’m so sorry,” she says immediately, bricking back up. “I don’t know what came over me.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Bobbi shrugs but watches her carefully. “It’s been a stressful time for you guys. I’ve heard all about it.”

Jemma wonders how and then remembers Hunter. Hunter, who helped Fitz when she couldn’t. She knows it wasn’t quite like that – nothing is so black and white – but self-loathing leaves a vile taste in her mouth.

“Hunter told you,” she says quietly. “Of course, he did.”

“Of course, he only told me about it _after_ he’d already sent Fitz into space. He came back with such a story, I didn’t believe him. Still didn’t, until we got invited back here.”

Mack’s leadership went where even Phil Coulson couldn’t. Anything for his friends.

“Yes, SHIELD is expanding rather quickly. Of course, it’s all part of the plan.”

Bobbi touches nudges her gently. “But not your plan.”

“No,” Jemma sighs, wistful and still a little bit tearful. This isn’t part of her plan. She would rather be somewhere else entirely right now. “But it’s alright. We’re needed here. We couldn’t leave not after… well, we owe a lot.”

“Mack isn’t really the type to make sure you pay back. That guy,” Bobbi laughs, shaking her head. “He’s got the biggest heart of anyone I know.”

“Of course,” Jemma hurries to assure, hating to be misunderstood. “But we couldn’t leave. We owed it to him to get it off the ground. Properly.”

“Fair enough.” Bobbie’s smile is so easy, so genuine, that Jemma wonders how she does it. Life’s not been easy for them, they’d been running for a few years before they were invited back, and yet Bobbi still looks so in control of it all. How is she not falling apart? Jemma feels like a pile of bones, stacked precariously on top of each other. One false move, one sudden jerk, and she’ll topple and all that will be left of her is rubble.

Suddenly she’s very self-conscious of her behaviour. “I’m so sorry for being silly,” she says, wiping her eyes with the corner of her lab-coat. An improper habit, complete defiance of lab protocol. Something to add to the list these days. “I don’t even know what happened.”

“I get it, you know. You were away for so long and you had to be fine. Then you come back and you don’t have to be anymore.” A gentle nudge and a gentle smile.  “You’ll get there, eventually.”

In her whole life, there have been few people Jemma has trusted as quickly and as easily as Bobbi Morse. So desperately does she want to believe her.

“As long as another disaster doesn’t come along.” She fiddles with the hem of her lab coat, feeling a little more herself.

Bobbi chuckles and nods. “God forbid that should happen.”

There’s always another disaster, another situation that it seems only they can solve. It’s a big responsibility, one far greater than they originally signed on for.

“Do you regret it?” Jemma asks, needing to know if perhaps they are more alike than she thought. “Joining SHIELD, what it did to you and Hunter?”

“Well there’s a question,” Bobbi laughs but without ease. It takes her a few moments to gather an answer.

“Hunter and I, we’re always gonna be volatile, you know? It was never gonna be as smooth as you and Fitz. I think our personalities drove us away from each other as much as this organization ever would.” She takes a deep breath, looks around her shared bedroom. “But I love him, you know? He makes me happy. Regretting stuff is just going to make me unhappy. May as well just enjoy where I am now.”

 _Could I do that?_ Jemma wonders. _Can I just enjoy where I am now?_

“I think,” Jemma begins, voice quiet but resolute, slowly sure of herself, “I’d like to try doing that.”

Bobbi slings an arm around Jemma’s shoulders, pulling her in. It’s been so long since she’s had a hug that was just a hug, just so simple, just because it can be. “You know we’re all here for you, Jemma.”

She hadn’t known, not really. After all, what did she have to complain about? Now she knows. She has a family here as much as everyone else. They are hers, also.

“I know,” she nods, leaning into Bobbi quickly before standing up. The longer she’s away from the lab the worse it’ll seem. She must go apologise to Mari, make sure the mess has been wiped up properly. But maybe she’ll come back later, catch up with Bobbi – she never did get to see those pictures of the time her and Hunter were in the Bahamas. Maybe she’ll have hot chocolate with Daisy. Maybe she’ll have a beer with Elena.

Maybe, eventually, she might be alright.

“Thank you,” she says sincerely at the door, chin high and smile soft. “For everything.”

“Anytime, Simmons.” Bobbi sits on the bed, eyes twinkling. “Anytime.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you ever so much for reading! Please feel free to leave kudos/comment. Please feel free not to. Either way, I hope you have a lovely day <3


End file.
